"You're Just Going to Have to Wing it"

August 20

Current Place of "Residence" The Belden Stratford.
Subbed? Yes.
Grades Taught Second grade, fourth grade, kindergarten, and seventh grade.
Subject(s) Taught: Computer Science
Total times I wanted to say "fuck" Somewhere between 50 and 100 times. Half because of nerve and half because of kids.

The story of today starts around six twenty in the morning when I received a phone call from a number I only half recognized. The conversation went as such:

Me: Hello?
Woman: Hi this is CPS Sub Center are you still available to sub today?
Me: (after an overly-long moment of silence) What?
Woman: This is the Sub Center, are you still available to sub today?
Me: Yeah - er - yes. I'm available.
Woman: It's your first time isn't it?



She gave me information on the school I was headed to and even gave me a word of encouragement.

I walked into the front door, half an hour early before I had to be there, wearing a blue button down shirt and a nice pair of black slacks. I looked around and could not find students or teachers anywhere. Five seconds into my first day and I was positive that I had done something wrong already. Eventually, I saw teachers showing up and knew that I had, in fact, successfully followed my directions to the school. Every teacher I saw had some combination of jeans and a blue school polo on. I felt over dressed, but at least I had thought enough to color-coordinate. The woman who worked in the office called me over and handed me my schedule for the day. I followed a schedule where I floated from room to room all day but I had my first period free. One hour to do whatever I needed to prepare for the day ahead. I went to my car and took one of the best forty-five minute naps I've ever taken.

I checked with the main office for a lesson plan or some sort of direction and received the most helpful piece of advice.  "You're teaching computer science, but I don't have anything prepared. You're just going to have to wing it today." Great. I am certified in the state of Illinois to teach sixth through twelfth grade social studies and I'm going to have to come up with a few computer science lessons on the fly.  That went out the window fast.  What follows is what I did each period and a few takeaways from the experience.

Second Grade: Lesson taught: Teacher told students they had to write spelling words five times. Lesson learned: Second graders do not know how to translate words from a board to a piece of paper. Second graders do not understand the concept of five times. Second graders to not understand the concept of quiet work.

Fourth Grade: Lesson taught: Use iPads to research their topic for the paper they are going to write. Lesson learned: Never give a group of ten-year-olds a tool that gives them the option of doing academic research or playing Angry Birds.

Kindergarten: Lesson taught: Color. Lesson lear- No really. The lesson I was teaching them for their computer science class was to color a picture of whatever they wanted. Lesson learned: Even the simplest lessons can go awry. Also: Snot. Kindergartners produce more snot than any other creature I have ever seen.

Seventh Grade: Lesson taught: Nothing. The teacher literally walked out of the room and said "I guess I'll get you some word searches. Lesson learned: Thirteen-year-olds with nothing to do but a word search will beg you for something to do, but hate anything you suggest.

So I know I've already discussed a bunch of different lessons from the day but I wanted to end with a more over-arching lesson. Having done all of my observations and previous teaching in high school I developed a pretty good classroom management plan. I had a handle on classrooms and could get a task done. However none of these tactics worked in elementary school. It was a loud day, but I foresee many more to come.

Lesson 2: You can't catch a whale with shark bait